LoveHoney Sex Toys

I tried the Mathmos Space Projector, and that was admittedly funky, but it didn’t quite push all my buttons.

What I’ve decided that I really really really want is a micro projector, one of those dinky pocket-sized projectors that can beam games, movies, photos and, yes, porn onto any flat surface. Or, indeed, any bendy surface if you’re that way inclined and don’t mind looking at wonky pictures.

My only problem is that I can’t decide which one to buy, and I’m not spunking £260 up the wall until I’ve worked out which is best and which is not.

So I’m keeping a super-sharp eye on developments at this micro projectors blog.

Yes.

Fans - buy me sexy costumes and lingerie!

Please!

“Linda” has just commented on my Setanta Sports Phone Number post, which now has 20 comments from disgruntled Setanta customers - who are at varying stages of desperately trying to become ex-customers.

Here’s what Linda says - and she has a very useful e-mail address for us… Hurrah!

Ive just phoned the number and of course was put into a queue to hold for cancellations (says a lot in itself having to queue)! However, after 20 minutes of chamber music dirling in my lughole, I’d had enough.

Phoned the 0191 number which has now been disconnected. So back to the 0871 number, and before they got a chance to put me into the queue again, I demanded to be unsubscribed there and then.

‘Can’t do that’ - OK says I, how do I cancel without spending a fortune hanging on and listening to dire music?

So the nice lady gave me the email address - requests@setanta.com.

In the subject heading of the email put CANCELLATION, then list your account number, name and address, and finally the reason why you want to leave Setanta. Just done it but not holding my breath. Next step will be to cancel my direct debit to them if I get no satisfaction.

Thanks for the numbers BTW”

And thank you for the e-mail address, Linda. Let us know if it works!

I was walking in clear view in front of our building and it came rushing past me within about 6 inches of me to the left - this despite the fact that there was a gaping car park further to the left of him.

Clearly the driver was in an incredible hurry to get to the Howden’s Joinery next to our warehouse. As you can see, he pulled up within about 12 inches of Howden’s steps.

I saw the driver go into Howden’s so thought I’d go and point out that he nearly killed me, and ask whether he could be more than helpful in future.

In return, I got a volley of expletives and abuse, and was told it was my fault for “Walking in the middle of the road.”

Er, it’s a car park not a road.

And, er, as you can see from the picture there’s no room for pedestrians between your van and the steps.

But the crazy thing is that despite driving dangerously and nearly killing me, and then giving me a tirae of abuse, he’s got his employer’s name and phone numbers plastered all over the side of his van.

Imagine inviting someone like that into your home to do some work!

So if you are looking to hire a plumber, building contractor or gas appliance installer in Bath, I’d suggest you look for someone who has a much friendlier demeanour than this bloke who works for RS Harper and Son.

Who knows, maybe it’s RS Harper himself, or maybe the son? Perhaps they’d like to comment.

A lot of pedestrians and schoolchildren walk through the car park in front of our warehouse and Howden’s.

If people drive as dangerously as this RS Harper and Son driver, then someone is going to get seriously hurt or even killed.

So RS Harper and Son might be the best gas appliance installation outfit in Bath, but when it comes to safe driving and treating people with respect and decency, at least one of their employees has got a lot to learn.

I’ve reported the driver to the police. It will be interesting to see what they do about it.

TOP 10 HITS is a thrilling story about a music magazine journalist and pop photographer who jump from hit parade to Hit List when they get drawn into a Hitman’s sadistic plot to kill off his Top 10 most-hated pop artists.

Says Pete’s site - I couldn’t make that stuff up!

Here’s the cover - make sure you bag your copy when Pete pulls his finger out and gets it for sale on his site. Or Amazon. Or somewhere.

You can follow our football gambling exploits on our Million Quid Gamble Web site. It’s fair brilliant even if I do say so myself.

So far we’ve turned our fiver into £16.33 thanks to winning 2 short-odds doubles.

The only rules are that when we bet we have to bet it all. And we can’t take any money out until we’ve won a million - or more.

Wish us us luck!

I still haven’t had my refund for the money that Setanta stole, they haven’t replied to my last letter and I’ve had better things to do than go to the Small Claims Court.

But Setanta, in its dumb-headed computer-controlled idiotic wisdom, has still seen fit to leave me on its spammy junk mail database so I’m receiving endless e-mails and snail mail entreatments to sign up to the service again.

NOT FUCKING LIKELY, YOU THIEVING SETANTA BASTARDS.

Did I mention that Setanta had stolen some money from me and has the worst customer service I’ve ever experienced (worse even than British Airways, as it happens. More of that one day, maybe).

See anything you like, mister?

One helpful clue on the letter - a postcode for Setanta’s office in Sunderland - SR9 9XZ.

I’m a bright spark and have noticed that Sunderland is a different place to Kirkaldy, the Setanta head office that you have to write to in order to get a refund.

My letter was (fake) signed by Robert Robinson, the self-described Marketing Operations Director, GB, so I’ll try to get in touch with him and see if he’s got any clout when it comes to sorting out the dog’s dinner that is Sentanta awful customer service.

And if you’re wondering where Setanta’s Robert Robinson might be sitting right now, here’s the Setanta Sunderland office on Google Maps. It’s that big long building at the bottom, just above the A19.

They must have a real live human being in there somewhere…

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